Don't get me wrong, to fail at this really isn't to fail at all. Just making an attempt at an ultra alone is pretty note worthy. Then throw in the fact that it's an attempt at 135 freaking miles in the dead of winter while pulling a sled filled with 42 lbs of survival gear, food, and water. Hopefully you begin to understand my point. Please don't feel sorry for me. I made it 105 miles and because of my mistakes I was unable to complete my goal. While it is not easy for me mentally, I am completely alright with that. I came away from this with some valuable lessons learned.
Just because it's named the icebox of the nation it does not always mean it's going to be cold. This year it was a rather warm, in the mid to high 20's, throughout most of the race. This in fact brought on a whole different set of challenges. The trail conditions were absolutely atrocious. The snow was loose, uneven, and just would not pack at all. It was almost comical to think, if someone was watching, it would be easy for them to mistake us for drunken sailors walking home to the barracks after last call at the local bar. Every line we would try would quickly turn to shit only to move left or right and find the exact same shitty conditions. It was easy to see from the get go that every mile was going to be hard fought. Aparently they had not gotten very much snow or cold this year leading up to the race. The trail had not even seen any grooming yet as a result. The trail was snow covered but there were sections with lots of undergrowth still sticking up through the surface.
Trail conditions and lack of cold aside, none of us are out there hoping this will be easy. In actuality most of us want it to be as difficult as possible knowing that this is what will make the journey that much more memorable and worth while. This year because of the warm weather, and like every long race I've run, I ended up getting rid of a bunch of stuff at the last minute that I knew I wouldn't need. I got rid of my snow pants, extra tights, extra hats, extra gloves. I also made a last minute decision to not take my hydro pack. This meant I would have to go back to my sled every time I needed a drink. That may have been the worst decision of all of them. This also meant I would not have any water with me. I had the not so brilliant idea to use V8 fusion veggie/fruit juice as my soul means of hydrating. It has 100 calories per 8 oz serving and my thought was the calories would give me energy and I wouldn't have to depend on solid food as much. I tested this theory a bit in training but not enough to use it in a race of this magnitude. I should have know better too, but did it anyway. This led to some pretty severe dehydration. Now looking back and reading up on the subject I've been able to learn from this. The combo of having to go back to my sled to drink and the fact that I was drinking juice vs water is what lead to my eventual demise.
RACE START to CHECK POINT 1 Mile 35 (The Gateway Store)
The race starts off from Kerry Park in International Falls, MN. Racers are required to check in just before the start of the race in the lobby of the hockey rink. Most of us get there just before the start of the race. There is no point in standing outside in the cold any longer than we have to. The race start is pretty low key and it's a sea of red blinking lights.
https://youtu.be/7vsRzFSYtx8 Racers Are You Ready? The Arrowhead 135 Start Line.
I find some familiar faces and we all wish each other a good journey as the bikes are already being sent on there way. Two minutes later the 2 skiers are sent off as well. Finally 56 or so of us runners gather at the start line and Ken(the race director),"says release the hounds!!" I find a spot not too far back from the front and make an attempt to trail John Storkamp again like I did last year, but it is soon very aparent John is on a mission. He is not only making his 11th attempt at this race, but it is also his 100th race of a marathon or longer. It was easy to see he was going to make an attempt at going after the win yet again. He's won this race multiple times. He was flying right off the bat!! Anyways, I settle in thinking I would run at an easy pace all the way to the turn which is 9-10 miles out. I visit with a couple other runners, one of them being Rob who was in hot pursuit of Storkamp, they eventually pass by. It didn't take long and I was pretty much alone. As soon as I made the turn at the 1st shelter I new we were in for one hell of a battle.
The trail had gone from bad to worse. Now any plan I had was vertually thrown out the window. Every single step was going to be hard fought. It was easy to see this was going to be a low finish rate year unlike last year when I got my first finish. From mile 10-20 I was pretty much alone. Along side the trail are a few deer stands.
I also came across a pretty gruesome seen that showed that not only were deer around, but plenty of wolves too.
^^Warning a little graphic video of a deer kill at the edge of the trail^^
At mile 19 we cross the only major road of the race. I had hoped that this would bring better trail knowing that it isn't as swampy once you cross the hwy. Unfortunately it was not any better. In this section somewhere I got passed by a group of three runners(Kirk, Randy, and Jason) as I was passing two runners myself. The two I was passing were having troubles with one of the downhills. I jumped on my sled and flew by them laughing, as I did, "I say look out below, ya got to work smarter not harder!" Of the three that over took me I knew 2 of them. Jason passed me with 1 mile to go last year. Randy, I met in the parking lot of my hotel the night before the race. I later found out that Kirk took 2nd place at The Tuscobia 160 two weeks earlier. We all chatted a bit as they went by. These three seemed to be working together as they slowly separated from me. They were also in good spirits and seemed to be having fun. I would see them a few more times at the next two check points.(all three went on to finish in the top 10 this year) I got into the 1st check point out of liquid yet again, but in much better shape than the past two years. It had already gotten dark by the time I got there. Given the condition of the trail I was only 15 minutes behind my time from the previous 2 years. I made my way into the store after checking in with the race officials outside. I pulled up a chair near the trio I just mentioned. They were joined by Sue Lucas. Last years female winner on foot and current course record holder. She was also the outright winner at the Tuscobia 150 the year I ran the 75 miler. I met her that year out on the trail in the middle of the night as we were headed into the final check point. This year she was making an attempt at doing the race on bike. She had already decided to pull the plug before we arrived. Now she was just hanging out chatting with incoming runners. There were plenty of other casualties here as well. You could tell by the look on their faces that they were done. They had that deer in the headlights look to them. It's similar to a thousand yard stare. A look I know all too well having been in that exact same position 2 years ago when it was -26 degrees at the start. I quickly make my way to the cash register and purchase some fresh home made Goulash along with some Gatorade. I jokingly ask the girls behind the counter, "Is this the place where we sign up for our massage?" The girl working burst out laughing and said back, "boy if it is I'm signing up too." That got everyone within earshot laughing. One of the ladies said, "that's pretty good that you still have a sense of humor even after running 35 miles." How could I not? I'm out doing what I love. I headed back to my seat to finish my scrumptious goulash and rehydrate as much as possible. Then I changed into dry clothes including fresh socks.(even though my shoes are soaking wet) After 46 minutes I was headed back out onto the dark lonely trail.
CHECK POINT 1 TO CHECK POINT 2 (MEL GEORGE RESORT) MILE 70
Upon leaving check point one I pass a lot of runners coming in the opposite direction on the spur trail into the store. I try to give them all a little encouragement as we pass. Most do the same back to me. One even gives me a high five! I wish I knew who that was... As I turn onto the main trail I encounter a runner making a pit stop. I ask how he's doing and he replied almost too chipper that he was doing great. He had a maple leaf on his pack so I assumed he was from Canada. I continued on as he apparently was waiting to pee. The next 27 miles or so I was alone with my thoughts. Already I was going to some dark mental places inside my mind. The negative thoughts would creep up and it was as if I was in a mental battle for my life. Physically I was doing fine at this point, but mentally I was struggling. In this sport any negative thoughts can lead to your eventual demise. I managed to do pretty well by countering my thoughts with a little self accessment. I kept coming back to the fact that I was not injured so there was no way in hell I was going to allow myself to give up and quit. At mile 57 I pulled into a trail side shelter to finally give my snowshoes a try. I was sick and tired of sinking into the trail with every push off. Another runner and one of the snowmobile volunteers were there as well. The other runner had been in his snowshoes almost the entire race. He was cooking a meal on the smoldering fire that the volunteer must have made. The volunteer was fast asleep just across the trail next to his machine in his bivvy sack. He was sawing some serious logs. It was hard not to laugh at each one of his snorts. After quickly putting my snowshoes on I was back on the trail. I couldn't believe how slippery it was in the snowshoes even though they have crampons on the bottom. I actually fell going down the 1st hill to a creek crossing. Soon however, I got used to them and began to kick myself for not putting them on much earlier. Now I had about 13 miles to the next check point. I kept going over in my head what time I should be able to get there.(Trail math) You never want to rely on trail math. I knew it would be close, but I was going to make an attempt to get there before the sun came up. Knowing I made it there last year just before sunup had me thinking I must have really shaved some time at the first check point. Especially considering the trail conditions. I found it strange how familiar the trail seemed as I got closer and closer to Elephant Lake. Having only been though this section once it was as it every land mark would trigger a memory from the year prior. I soon found myself heading down the boat landing and making my way out onto the lake. As I got further out onto the lake I was surprised nobody was behind me. It's supposed to be a mile across the lake but it sure seems like closer to two. Being exposed to the wind out on the lake I started to catch a serious chill. The fact that I was soaked didn't help matters much either. Finally I rounded the point and have the resort in my sights. It feels good to be back in civilization after spending the entire night virtually alone. As I make my way up the stairs to the cabin to check in I still have my snowshoes on. I had now gone further than I ever have in a pair a snowshoes. As I take them off I grab my drop bag from the porch. The volunteers greet me as I walk through the front door. They take my bib number and point me to a very comfy looking chair right by the door. Within minutes they are offering me hot soup, a world famous grilled cheese sandwich, and hot apple cider. The soup went down good, but I was already beginning to having trouble getting the grill cheese down. I was again very dehydrated and could not swallow the sandwich. As I sat there I worked on getting my wet clothes off and changing into something warm and dry. People kept coming and going through the front door which made it virtually impossible to warm up. I put everything I had with me on in an attempt to warm up. Finally I decided just to move even though I had one of the most comfy chairs in the place. Moving helped tremendously. After getting warmed up the volunteers took my wet stuff off to another cabin and put it in a dryer. I figured I'd lay down for a hour or so and try to catch a few z's. Instead of being smart and heading up to the warm loft filled with beds, I was worried I would get to comfy and not want to wake up. So I laid down on the kitchen floor next to the entrance to the bathroom and closed my eyes. After a while Ken(the race director) came in and told me, "you know there are beds upstairs?" I just kind of laughed and told him I didn't want to get so comfortable that I wouldn't want to leave. After waking up I worked on consolidating all my food and packed up my clothes making sure I had one dry set of stuff to change into if something went wrong out on the trail. It was now about 2 hours longer than I wanted to be there, but I was ready to start my journey to the finish line.
CHECK POINT 2 TO THE FINAL CHECK POINT (SKI PULK) mile 111
Leaving the resort I was now feeling absolutely perfect. The sun was up and it looked to be a beautiful day ahead. I chose to leave without my snowshoes on knowing a shelter was just 3 short miles away. I figured if the trail was still as bad I'd stop there and put them back on. The trail never really did improve, but because wearing the snowshoes caused my socks and pants legs to get wet and eventually turned into ice balls I chose to push on without them. Next year I will have gaiters that will hopefully prevent that problem. This is when the major hills begin.
https://youtu.be/lq6-0YunZro Mile 75-80 as the hills start coming one right after the other.
It took me a couple hours to figure out that I was now well over half way. During the day I caught up to John Bertum. He too passed me toward the end last year as well. Seeing him I knew I was doing well. He has finished quite a few times and even posted some really good times over the years. Somehow we got separated after spending a little time together near a logging area.
The logging road was the best trail we had seen the entire race. One of the loggers offered me a ride but I told him I'd race him instead seeing how overloaded his truck was. He laid on the horn and I took off running up the road. He caught me but ran into break problems and had to stop to fix a hung up break. I laughed and passed him like he was standing still.(because he was)
https://youtu.be/xzxLKM_nHgw Video of me chasing the logging truck
Unfortunately our trails soon separated and I was back on the loose snowmobile trail. It began to snow at this point and the tracks were starting to disappear. The trail made a couple turns and soon I could only see one set of tracks. I could tell it was a kick sled and that I must be gaining on him. Pretty soon I did catch him. It was Lindsay Gauld. I told him I was starting to worry we were off course because I only saw his tracks. However it must have just been that enough snow had fallen to cover all the other tracks. But soon we hit a steep hill and you could see all the deep foot prints from the poor bikers pushing their heavily loaded bikes up the hill. After passing Lindsay my day started to unravel. It was still daylight but I was starting to have trouble keeping food or drink down. Everything I put in would come right back up. I also passed Carla Goulart in this section as the hills just seem to get more and more arduous. Carla is from Brazil and is an amazing athlete. She was on her 4th attempt at finishing. She went on to be the first women finisher this year and tied with Lindsey for 11th over all. Soon night fell and my fueling just kept getting worse. I kept making attempts to eat by changing what I was eating in a hopes that something would agree with me and actually stay down. Nothing was working. The hills continued to be unrelenting. The juice I was drinking was kind of red so every time it would come back up it looked as though I was vomitting up blood all over the white snow. Finally I climbed a hill and could see someone standing in the middle of the trail. It was Todd.(One of the snowmobile volunteers) He was standing out front of a trail shelter. He asked how I was doing. I told him my situation and said I was going to stay there and bivvy in hopes that the throwing up would pass. He seemed to think that was a good plan too. I went around the back side of the shelter and set up my sleeping area. After crawling into my bag I was fast asleep, but not for long. After maybe 10 minutes I woke to a horrible coughing jag which led to more puking. After about an hour of this and very little sleep I packed back up and had no choice but to press on. Then after a few more hours of unrelenting hills and more puking I could feel the fight coming out of me. What should have been a simple task of 4-5 more miles became the ultimate obstical in my mind. The hardest thing for me in the world at that moment was admitting defeat. I could hear Todd coming back through on his snow machine. I was done. My will was broken and my race was over.......105 miles was all I had in me that day....
The next morning with tears in my eyes I called home to check in with my wife. I told her not to ever let me do this race again. Only to wake 4 hours later with a plan to come back next year and fight even harder. I could not believe it was over and I wasn't even sore. I had no hobble and climbing stairs was no trouble. Some how my body has either adapted to this torture or I just didn't have a chance to give it my all. I am humbled that Ken allows me to race. Failing makes it hard to feel worthy of the spot he has given me the past 3 years.
The next morning I find some solace while getting words of encouragement at breakfast from the man with the most attempts. John comes over and mentions that he's still got me beat. He has 3 DNF's and it is good to see he is human as he hobbles back to his seat. With his 11 attempts, 3 or 4 wins, and all his finishes in the top 10, the Dude is a Rockstar to me. Yet at the same time so very gracious and approachable. As are most of these people that do this stuff. It's probably why I love it so much.
Many, many thanks to Ken, Jackie, and all the amazing volunteers.
Below is a little video of some of the training I put in. My miles were not as many as they should have been, but with my knees I take what I can get. Almost every mile since the Superior 100 was pulling a sled or trailer. In just a few days I go in for experimental stem cell procedures on my knees. One can only pray that it works and I am able to get back to running by fall.
https://youtu.be/9PU5RtiR2Cg Arrowhead Training (Chasing Arrowhead)
Until next time Dream Big my friends. There are no limits to what you can achieve if you believe....
Our biggest limitations are mental. Once you convince yourself it can be done you are 80% of the way there. Good luck! Go big!
No comments:
Post a Comment